Friday, June 21, 2013

The unexpected things

I always hope that I will be good for the others, but sometimes thing called "mood-destroyer" come and yeah make everything into trouble. what i must do in times like that? should i be foolish like nothing happen and let anything go? well, i can't do that, particularly. and yeah my anger alwasys blown up. for some people (like my family) may understand me well, they just sit around me and looked at me like nothing happen, nothing would change because i mad at them. but for some people, i feel like they don't know what's going on with me, like they don't understand me quite well yet maybe we know each other pretty much well. yeah but that's still there actually. do i have to tell them lie? tell them that i'm okay but actually i'm not okay. do i have to be dishonest? and since when, telling lies always come with the clean state? they will come up with bigger lies. and since when, telling lies will make everything come better? isn't it hard for other people that i come clean and show who i really am? is it hard for other people to see me "that's peculiar me"? you know what, it feels not good. it's just not good enough.

Hope you all do well,


Wednesday, June 5, 2013


I feel like having so much deadline come in to me time by time, so fast! and i didn't recognize how much time i waste yesterday or how much time i have tomorrow (what is it?) practically i'm just sleep 4-5 hours a day, feeling rush hour every time i watch the clock and i really hate this kind of feeling. i always manage my time, but i don't know why sudden things show up in my thrill hours (accidentaly? doubt it.) But I'm just being me and mine. Hahaha, as long as I'm patient with it and of course focus with what i am doing at that moment, I'll get what I have to be, rite? definetely! I love putting my best efforts, a lot of people arround me say that I really give everything that i could for the one that i interest, yeah that's who i am and i will make every moments of my time useful. being useful for another, i really want to be that kind of people that not forget how i reach my peak time. every things i have till know its come from ALLOH SWT and will back to ALLOH SWT someday. I just maintain it to be good and better. I hope i will be better at managing my time, it's not late for change.